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Althea, illustrated by Lisa Kopper. When Uncle Bob Died. London, U.K.: Dinosaur Publications, 1988.
Before Uncle Bob dies, the narrator finds a dead butterfly, which is used to explain death to him. The narrator is angry with Uncle Bob for leaving. The reality of Uncle Bob's death makes him worry that he will lose his father when his father is ill. He comes to terms with Uncle Bob's death by talking to his cousins, Uncle Bob's children, listening to them and playing with them. The importance of a child's attendance at funerals, to provide closure, is also mentioned. A useful starting point for discussing death with ages five and up.
RELATIVE ILLNESS
Amos, Janine, illustrated by Gwen Green, photographs by Angela Hampton. Death (Separations Series). Bath, U.K.: Cherrytree Books, 1997.
This book uses letters and case studies to illustrate the points discussed. This book does not discuss death as a concept. However its strength lies in the depth with which it discusses the emotions experienced after someone dies, and the development of coping mechanisms. This book goes further than many similar texts as it discusses the future and how to cope with a surviving parent's new relationship. It also emphasises the validity of the child's feelings, allowing them time to grieve and say goodbye: [r]emember, it takes time to say goodbye to someone you loved. However long it takes is the right time for you.
NON-FICTION
Arnold, Caroline, illustrated by Helen K. Davie. What We Do When Someone Dies. New York, N.Y.: Franklin Watts, 1987.
This book is also recommended for the 7-12 Age Group.
A book which answers questions adults do not usually think need answering, but those which children sometimes need to know. Chapters include: All Living Things Die; What Happens to the Body; Death Announcements; The Funeral Ceremony; After the Funeral; Remembering the Dead; Beliefs About Death. Information found in the text includes: death certificates; autopsy; embalming; epitaphs; life insurance policies; the eulogy; memorials (for example, the Taj Mahal). Beliefs About Death includes Christian and Hindu. It finishes with [e]ven though people we know do die, they continue to stay alive in our memories of them.
NON-FICTION
Brown, Laurene Krasny, illustrated Marc Brown. When Dinosaurs Die: a Guide to Understanding Death. Boston: Little, Brown and Company, 1996.
The use of anthropomorphic dinosaurs helps to distance the reader from the subject dealt with in the text. The illustrations and page design are in a comic-book format. However simple the content matter it touches on some areas which most other books aimed at younger age groups do not, such as suicide and war as causes of death. It is very basic but would provide a good background to the subject.
NON-FICTION
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Bryant-Mole, Karen. Death (What's Happening? Series). Hove, East Sussex: Wayland Publications, 1992.
This book provides basic information as well as dealing with the emotions surrounding grief. The reasons for funeral services are among the topics dealt with. It contains short chapters entitled: Death; When do People Die?; I'm Frightened; Is it My Fault?; Who'll Take Care of Me?; What Happened?; Talking About It; Special Occasions; The Future.
[Includes a small section for parents and teachers and a glossary]
NON-FICTION
Bunting, Eve, illustrated by Vo-Dinh Mai. The Happy Funeral. New York, N.Y.: Harper & Row, 1982.
Laura is a young Chinese-American girl who attends the funeral of her grandfather. Laura is confused because her mother calls it a "happy funeral" but everyone is crying. Laura remembers the happy times she shared with her grandfather. Laura realises that the funeral is happy for her grandfather, as he had lived a good life and was happy to go.
GRANDPARENT OLD AGE
Carlstrom, Nancy White, illustrated by Amy Schwartz. Blow Me a Kiss, Miss Lilly. New York, N.Y.: Harper and Row, 1990.
A lovely story which tells of the relationship between Sara and her elderly neighbour Miss Lilly. Miss Lilly is a long-term resident in the community with bonds to many people, but Sara is her best friend. One year Miss Lilly is hospitalised and never returns. Sara's family care for Miss Lilly's cat, Snug, and Sara reminds him of everything the three of them used to do. Sara's memories help her work through her grief, so that she can celebrate the fun she had with Miss Lilly.
PEER OLD AGE
Carrick, Carol, illustrated by Donald Carrick. The Accident. New York, N.Y.: Seabury Press, 1976.
Christopher's dog, Bodger, dies after being hit by a car while Christopher watches. Christopher reacts badly, especially when his father buries Bodger without Christopher's knowledge. Christopher's father helps Christopher work through his grief and anger, and lets him cry.
PET ACCIDENT
Chin-Yee, Fiona, illustrated by Bill Johnson. Sam's Story. Halifax, Nova Scotia: Project Sam Publishing Company, 1988.
Sam is trying to make sense of his world and family following the cot death of his baby brother, Little Pat. Sam's mother is overwhelmed by grief and cannot cope with Sam's questions. Sam remembers the day Little Pat died, when nothing was explained to him. Now his home doesn't feel like home anymore. Sam believes in magical thinking, that if he is good and brave then the big men (the ambulance drivers) will bring Little Pat back. Sam's Gran comes to visit to help Sam understand about Little Pat's death.
[Includes Parent Guide]
SIBLING INFANT DEATH
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Clardy, Andrea Fleck, illustrated by Eleanor Alexander. Dusty Was My Friend: Coming to Terms with Loss. New York: Human Sciences Press, 1984.
This book concerns death by accident and the death of a peer, both rarely dealt with topics for this age group. The narrator and his brother, Peter, have difficulty in accepting their friend Dusty's death. The narrator seeks information about the car accident in order to understand Dusty's death. This question seeking is a common part of the grief process. The narrator expresses his grief through a letter to Dusty, and by cherishing his memories of Dusty. This is an older text, with soft almost monochrome illustrations.
PEER ACCIDENT
Cohn, Janice, illustrated by Gail Owens. I Had a Friend Named Peter: Talking to children About the Death of a Friend. New York, N.Y.: William Morrow, 1987.
A good book for introducing death and the funeral process as it follows Betsy's parents explaining the death of her friend Peter. It also touches on wishful thinking, as Betsy believes that it was her saying "I never want to see you again" which caused Peter's death. The illustrations show Betsy's parents comforting her.
[Includes Notes for parents]
PEER ACCIDENT
Cohn. Janice, illustrated by Gail Owens. Molly's Rosebush. Morton Grove, Ill.: Albert Whitman and Company, 1994.
Molly remembers why they planted a pink rosebush in the garden. It was to acknowledge her baby brother or sister that wasn't strong enough to survive, and died in-utero. Molly's parents carefully explain what has happened and answer Molly's questions honestly, even if it means they acknowledge they don't know the answers. Molly's grandma helps explain things to Molly also.
[Includes Notes for parents]
SIBLING MISCARRIAGE
Connolly, Margaret, illustrated by Rosita Manahan. It Isn't Easy. Oxford, U.K.: Oxford University Press, 1997.
Told by Ross' little brother, this book tells the story of Ross' death and the family's grief. Ross dies as he runs in front of a car while he is playing with his brother. Ross' brother's feelings are realistic: he misses him; he hates him; he hates the injustice that Ross died but old people are still alive; he remembers all their arguments and fights; he remembers the fun and laughs, too; he feels weird being an only child. His emotions seesaw between good and bad, happy and sad. A very good book for describing the grief process.
SIBLING ACCIDENT
de Bode, Anne and Rien Broere, English translation by Su Swallow. Grandad, I'll Always Remember You. London, U.K.: Evans Brothers, 1997.
After Tom's Grandad dies Tom's family tell Tom what dead is: that it is forever; that it is like Grandad's battery ran down and stopped; what a coffin is; what a funeral is; what happens after death. Tom's family also include him in the decisions about the funeral. Tom remembers special things about his Grandad, but worries that Grandad doesn't know he's dead. Tom writes Grandad a letter telling him, and then dreams about Grandad. The letter floats through the air into the night.
GRANDPARENT OLD AGE
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